FunkyPix2: Jesus WAS regarded as a terrorist. Priscilla Bracks is correct. Howard & Rudd are wrong

A forensic reconstruction of the likely real face of Jesus [‘son of god’] reveals a startling similarity to Osama [‘son of laden’]. Jesus probably looked a lot like middle-eastern people of today (scientific source of photo). These days, he would probably have major hassles getting through Australian airports.

Before lashing out at "Bearded Orientals" (the Blake Art Prize entries of Osama as Jesus and the Virgin Mary wearing the burqa), Australia's leaders should consult History. Unfortunately for this day and age, History as a school subject is but a shadow of its former self, thanks to John Howard’s constipated education policies. (Er... alter that to "re-education".)

History might have revealed several convenient untruths in Howard’s prejudiced knee-jerk pseudo-Christian stance. Facial discrimination. Let’s be brutally honest, Johnny Ducklips, and admit that your denouncement of these legitimate works of art has more to do with immediate politics than aesthetics, fairness - or History. And judging by this typical right wing reactionary critique from the pungently pugnacious neo-con Andrew Bolt, the painting is an enormous success in making the Empire extremely cross :-)

............. The works which offended Australia’s holier-than-thou leaders.

Exhibit A: The Virgin Mary wearing a burqa is completely inoffensive to Australia's Muslim community because she is a revered figure in the Qu'ran and because she is covered appropriately. End of argument... unless, like our Dear Leaders, you are racially prejudiced against any Muslim symbol.

Exhibit B: 2000 years ago, your mate Jesus was an Insurgent, a political rebel, a Freedom-fighter, a TERRORIST of his day in the eyes of the authorities the Roman Empire. Jesus was “The Annointed One” in Jewish terminology – and in those days, only kings could ever be annointed. Therefore he was literally the “King of the Jews” – the last direct descendant of Israel’s King David, the sole legitimate heir to the throne of Israel.

That instantly elevated his status to Public Enemy Number One, the Ace of Diamonds, as far as Caesar was concerned. Caesar wanted Jesus dead or alive, just as the current American Caesar is now hunting for Osama. Just like Osama, Jesus had a band of close aides (Zealots) who were pro-Jewish activists or militia-men eg, Simon Sicarii (meaning “Simon the Dagger-man”). Just like in today’s Middle-East, the bible itself records that there were networks of “safe houses” among the Jewish population, allowing Moqtada al Jesus’s insurgent army to move constantly around the country in order to avoid capture. The cleansed modern image of a halo-ed, fluffy-bearded Jesus wandering peacefully with his friends through lush cornfields telling cute parables is pure bullshit. He spoke in parables because it was the Roman-proof 'code' of the day - 'for those with ears to hear' ie, Jewish metaphors for Jewish ears.

Go on, Johnny, send in the Jesus-Police and arrest me now. Besides, I’ve been associating with criminal elements from your corrupt Australian Wheat Board, so would probably fail Kevin Andrews' nasty little Character Test.

In the same way that Jesus had been concerned about the oppression of Jews by the Roman Empire, Osama is concerned about the oppression of Arabs/Muslims by the American Empire. Witness the recent denial of funds and electricity to Palestinians - how could they not be angry? If you think there’s any difference, your biases are showing. Could you possibly begin to conceive that in two thousand years from now, a Muslim-dominated world may just be praising Osama as a Prophet in the same way as today's Christians look back on Jesus as their ‘saviour’? Jesus’s band of armed Freedom Fighters could never have possibly imagined a Christian-dominated world, either.

But that’s hardly a surprise. The ironic thing is that Jesus wasn’t a Christian, and would have blown raspberries at anyone who had told him he would become the figurehead of some future non-Jewish religion. “Ridiculous!” he would have scoffed. "Think not that I am come to destroy the Law… Till Heaven and Earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the Law". [Jesus's alleged words as per the pen of Matthew 5: 17-18]. He was referring to the Torah, ie, Jewish law, exactly as Osama now refers to Sharia Law. Jesus was a fanatical JEW, repeat: JEW. He was wholly re-invented after his death as a convenient political symbol, a propaganda tool, by foreign people ('Gentiles') whom he would have regarded as ‘infidels’ to his strict Jewish beliefs. In our day, Che Guevara’s image has likewise been resurrected as the archtypal “heroic rebel” to continue whichever Revolution happens to be the flavour of the month.

Pause. I have a problem with the name 'Jesus'. The moment the name is mentioned, tame house-trained Christians are trained to get all reverent-and-holy, blinded to whatever contradictory information is held in front of their eyes. The name 'Jesus' is too often heard (and read) encircled with an automatic glowing halo. In the interests of short-circuiting that halo, I shall henceforth refer to Jesus as “Rabbi Jeshua”.

Un-pause. This image make-over trip through a western prism magically changed the colour of Rabbi Jeshua’s skin from brown to white. His hair transformed from dark curly Middle-Eastern to straight blonde Aryan. He miraculously began speaking Latin, German and English instead of his native Aramaic (the Hebrew equivalent of Latin). Rabbi Jeshua was even re-born with a new Greek-ified name, “Jesus”. His real Jewish name was Jeshua, son of Joseph, so as a lad he was probably called something like 'Jeshua bin Joseph'.

It was St Paul the Greek who, when Rabbi Jeshua was already long dead and unable to argue in his own defence, bestowed these propagandist revisions on him. Thanks to St Paul, Rabbi Jeshua was dragged out of his native Middle-East culture, and transplanted into a foreign European world ...so had to be culturally adjusted to fit. Even ‘Christos’ is a Greek word with which the good Rabbi was probably not familiar. Christianity ought to be re-named Paul-ism… or Pope-ism:

For further examples of

revisionist history, look no further than John Ducklips Howard’s preferred revisionist historians, Geoffrey Blainey or Keith Windschuttle

. For more gossip about the popes, browse through all my Religious Issues articles.

This ain’t Jesus or Jeshua. He couldn’t possibly have sported such blatantly European skin colour or facial features.

So John Ducklips Howard’s knee-jerk rejection of these works of art is itself to be denounced as cheap propaganda when observed in the glare of History’s bigger

picture. Times change as they go forwards - they don’t go backwards to the ‘Fifties (as Howard might long for). We must be honest, and recognize the obvious fact that the world is becoming increasingly Islamist, just like the Judeo-Roman world slowly transformed into a Christian one. That’s in large part a natural reaction to Christianity soiling its moral pants by economic oppression of the Poor via its Weapons of Mass Globalisation [read: Colonialism, Free Trade Agreements, Greed, APEC, Slavery, G7, Out-Sourcing, Not-Loving-Thy-Neighbour-As-Thyself, etc etc]. It’s precisely the same as the ancient Jews’ justified back-lash against Caesar for the heavy Roman taxation regime around the Mediterranean. False Christian historians have since transformed Rabbi J’s original message of Hatred and Resistance into a message of Fuzzy Love designed for modern consumption and 6% economic growth.
Hey, check out the ultra-white faces, too:

Rabbi Jeshua was fortunate to have hired savvy corporate consultants. Brands, logos, and icons have always been crucial to both Christian, Business and War propaganda machines, which historically have crusaded hand-in-hand.

And as one Empire is inexorably replaced by the next, new iconic figure-heads will always emerge. In Rabbi Jeshua’s day, history records that there were failed would-be Messiahs on every street corner, just like there are jihadists today. A few of them will stick around – but only if they can be politically exploited by later generations. I may as well call it the 'Mao Principle' It makes you wonder what “revisions” might in turn be posthumously superimposed on Osama’s image...

PS: I’m certainly not supporting Osama bin Laden’s terrorism any more than I’m supporting American-Israeli terrorism… just making observations on glaring hypocrisy, and inexorable manner in which History repeats cycles of empires. And that was precisely the message in the Priscilla Bracks pictures... for those who have ears to hear. More strength to her arm – she continues the honourable (and necessary) ‘Shock-the-Bourgeoise’ tradition of the Dada Movement. Artists and musicians are the ‘mine-canaries’, the most sensitive barometers of popular mind-set change. The fan is spinning and the shit is in the air.

But these days the Vatican spends most of its time in denial, defending itself from accusations of paedophilia. This is all speeding its own demise – faster than Christians care to believe.

Christians ensure as first priority that starving Africans get their desperately needed bibles. Here in Thailand, Christian missionaries still try to convert Buddhists, often by what amounts to bribery. Disgracefully disrespectful to the local culture.